In this moment…

I don’t understand why any of us are cruel 

It’s super bowl Sunday 

I drive to the store. Not for snacks, but for donuts and coffee. 

I think of my mom. Likely not an actual lover of football, although she claimed to love the Vikings. But more like just wants to be a part of life, of whatever is going on. 

Today she may or may not have the super bowl on. And if it is, she won’t watch. 

My mom has dementia. She sits alone—except on the days some of us in the family get to visit her. 

I reminisce about past super bowls. It was all a party to her. I cry for the woman she was. The woman I lost. 

I get my coffee. My donuts. I find when I get home, I don’t want them as much as I did before the tears fell. 

Walking through the front door of my home, I understand I feel, something I have noticed lately. I feel. Tears fall, and not from a place of pity for myself or cyclical suffering, but from somewhere real. 

Driving home from the store, I understand I can feel something other than what has come from a 33-year relationship (perhaps, we will get into that another time).

The year 2021— it said to me: I will be bittersweet. 

Already, it most certainly is 🌸

Guest Post: “The world is too much with us. Getting and spending we lay waste all our powers, little we see in nature that is ours.” “William Wordsworth”

By Lou DiVirgilio

Most of our living is at the level of our solar plexus.  This level of living coincides with our senses: seeing, smelling, hearing, feeling, and tasting.  The trouble with our senses is that they are not reliable. For example, it is dusk and you are walking, your eyes see something coiled, your senses say it is a snake.  However, the truth is, it is a coiled hose.  Its not that all our senses deceive us, they do however, lack the consciousness to discern fully, and at the same time you might say there is a quality of ignorance about them.  Our senses do however, provide us with the capacity to maneuver effectively about our lower levels of  our lives, that is “the getting and spending” part, but at the same time, negatively disassociates us with Nature. 

The Buddhist keep the relationship between the, lower material aspects of our lives, and the spiritual part,  by simply dividing the outcome of living a material based life, against the higher spiritual. The basic difference is that a strict material, “getting and spending” lived life, brings suffering, while the spiritual lived life brings happiness.  Most people, if asked which they would prefer, would chose happiness.  However, our “getting and spending” way of life has been praised, culturally excepted, and built into the perceived best practice of life to emulate. It has been praised so positively, that it has become a compulsion, to the point that we cannot control it, it controls us.   Compulsion is cyclical, and loops us, so that the more we use it the stronger it becomes, and the more difficult it becomes to brake free. 

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Guest Post: The Dual Nature of Human Nature

By Louis DiVirgilio

The moment we decide to enter upon the path of spiritual realization we are enlisting in a great war, between ourselves and ourselves.  Than, once we the discovery that our human nature is dual, and that a battle is ever going on between our higher self and our lower self, we began to realize, that of all battles, this is the most fearsome and terrible.  


What is so fearsome, is that we do battle with opposing aspects of our selves-the light side and the dark side, and conflict comes not only from outside sources, but also from habits of mind, laden with deep and powerful emotions, caused by experiences from both this and past lives.  All these kindred aspects of ourselves confront and attack in a rapid, and continuous succession. 

 
As we enter the battle field within ourselves, we call forth and analyze our life purpose, our motives, taking courage to compare wrong things with the right things.  There sitting nose to nose with our truth, we do battle with our lower nature, and by subduing pain and pleasure, by unbending faith in our higher self,  we secure sacred wisdom.  Then we can wheel our sword of wisdom, and slash through the world of illusion to gain freedom from our own mortality.

                                                One truth, many paths.  Be good, do good.

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Guest Post: The Wisdom Tree: A Christmas Story

By Lou DiVirgilio

Chris Martin was driving home from his work place earlier than usual. Usually he would leave his work about 4:30 pm, but this day he had left at 12, noon.  It was Christmas Eve, however that fact had little to do with Chris’s early departure.

Chris had arrived at his job on time, at 8:00am.  Out of the ten years he worked for the company, he was late only twice.  Once when his wife Elizabeth gave birth to their son Danial, and another when a record snow storm dumped 27 inches of the light and fluffy.  To say he was a responsible and dedicated employee, would be an understatement, for he was that and much more.  

There was a mood of excitement vibrating in the office.  Everyone seemed to be anticipating the festivities of Christmas Eve, and anxious to have at it. The din of excited voices was a background for the spirited activity going on:  people were laughing and talking with great animation, exchanging gifts, eating cookies and candy, drinking eggnog and hot apple-cider, singing Christmas Carols, and some of the men were stealth fully maneuvering the attractive women under the mistletoe to steal a kiss.

Chris too, was caught up in the festive excitement and anticipation of the morning.  After work he was to meet his wife and his children, Daniel and Lisa, at his in-laws house.  Of all the delightful experiences of the Christmas Season, Chris enjoyed this get-together most.  Every Christmas Eve for the past fifteen years, Elizabeth’s parents would graciously host a wonderful dinner, followed by the playing of Christmas Carols on the piano with the accompaniment of the guest’s voices, and then the opening of gifts.

Chris was standing at the work station of his friend Joe, talking with several other office workers.  He asked Joe, “Have you seen Stan.”  Stan was Chris’s best friend at the office and his immediate supervisor.  Joe answer, “No! I haven’t seen him this morning.  He’s missing all the fun.  Maybe he got caught by one of the big wigs, and had to do some butt kissing.”  Chris looked at his watch, 11:00am.  He needed several hours to put the finishing touches on a project that was dead-lined for today.  As he walked to his desk, Chris wondered why Stan wasn’t in the office.  It wasn’t like Stan to miss out on all the fun. 

Chris sat at his desk and turned on the computer.  On the screen was a pulsating message, “you got mail:” he pulled up the message.  It was a memo from Walter Becker, the Vice President of Human Resources, to all the employees of the Department of Engineering Support.   It said, “Due to a decision made by the Board of Directors, and in keeping with company policy of “expense leanness,” the Dept. of Engineering Support has been terminated, as of Jan. 1, 2000.  All employees of said department must vacate their work stations by close of the work day on Dec. 31. 1999.  All holiday pay and any vacation pay will be paid in full.  Please check with payroll for further questions or details. 

This is strictly a business decision, and had nothing whatsoever to do with the overall performance of the Dept. or any of its workers.  The Dept. has performed excellently over the years.

Human Resources is open to you if you need help in finding new employment or to foreword references.”

                                            “Happy Holidays!”

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Guest Post: Being is Not a Fixed State

By Lou DiVirgilio

As human beings living within our current evolutionary times, we ride along on the waves of our  immediate conditions and circumstances, and infuse our self’s with all the social, and cultural activities that conform to the ideal of the times.  We begin to incorporate these cultural ideals into the very fabric of our lives, and relate to them as real fixtures of our being.  We also begin to unconditionally ride these ideas as a way to build up our life capacities, strategies, and even our characteristics.  These ideas bring forth enormous power on behalf of our cultural, current understandings: for instance, the spread of religious understandings, the ready acceptance of philosophical principles, the growth of political fads, and the effigies of science, are all examples of the manner in which we may be torn from our moral moorings by these ideas sweeping over our minds and overwhelming both our willpower and our sense of moral responsibility. What is more, our resolve to move within truth, deteriorates, and we begin to live our lives on lower levels, and what is worse, we let ourselves become compulsive, recycling our behaviors over and over, until we lose control, and now instead of, we controlling our compulsions, our compulsions are now controlling us.  

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A throw back

My husband just airdropped this to me. Turns out in 2012 I used to write posts like this, and share them to subscribers. The reminder makes me wonder why I don’t really write anymore and that makes me sad. So since I’ve no new material, here’s something old and still relevant.

Guest Post~ Meditation: A Discipline of Mind

By Lou DiVirgilio

The idea of meditation and its practice has nested within our cultural confindmints for a number of years.  Generally, it congers up for us visions made popular by T.V. and movies: of priests or monks cloistered in some remote place, either chanting or quietly absorbed in prayer, or a practitioner of one of the marshal  arts preparing for mortal combat or some spaced out “newager” sitting in a crossed legged position trying to experience oneness.  Beyond those images, we have not a cultural niche of real value in which to place the practice of meditation.  

The problem is that we have no tradition, no established conceptual foundation, aside from the Science of Psychology whose study mainly focuses on the functions of the physical brain.  We therefore, need to barrow the cultural traditions of mind established over many ages, from the Orient and from India to help us understand, experience, and establish a true value for meditation. These borrowed traditions of mind are difficult for us to quickly and neatly integrate, adapt, and transpose into our culture.  Yet as remote as these concepts seem from our everyday experiences, we are beginning to realize that the practice of meditation has a relevance to our spiritual, mental, and physical lives. 

The motivation for this releverancy comes from our desperate desire to, in some way, neutralize and manage the stress and anxiety we create in our daily lives. People are desperately seeking any practice, method or technique that may relief their stress and bring some peace of mind.  The problem is that the search is usually confined to the material side, trying to find the right pill, therapy, medical technique  , psychological training, ect.  The more we search for cures from the outside, and the more our attempts fail to satisfy, the greater our stress, anxiety, insecurity, and confusion.  We are trying to satisfy infinite appetites with finite practices; an exercise in futility and ultimate frustration.  Life’s enduring fulfillments lie within us, and the practice of meditation puts us in touch with that infinite world within.  The practice of meditation begins to discipline our mind and gradually begins to abate those 1000 voices in the mind speaking at one time. 

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Guest Post: I Have Faith of the Heart

By Louis DiVirgilio

Seeing what is taking place in our world today, I began to realize it is not by chance, that the dire events happening are not the blind blowes of haphazard events, but are ominous fore warnings of the strife to come.  We must recognize that despite the agony and the sadness that we are now indowled with, there are spiritual powers and forces sweeping over our earth, rearranging, remaking, and reshaping, setting a progressive, positive evolution of a higher order. Fear not, it will all work out to an already predestined and sublime ending.  

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Guest Post: The Cyclical Revolvings of all Things

By Lou DiVirgilio

There is a contemporary saying, “The more things change, the more they stay the same.”  There is an ancient saying attributed to a Hebrew wise man, “There is nothing new under the sun.”  What these two sayings have in common is the suggestion that even though we see what is collectively designated as new, it is really a permutation of something that has already been.  What is thought to be new is an adaptation of something that has been, and what has been is a bases from which adaptations are created.  It is analogous to the Egyptian and East Indian myths of the Phoenix and the Garuda respectively.  These two birds, consume themselves in fire, then are resurrected from their ashes.  The operational theme in the above representation is the cyclic movement, from a time current bases, (from their former bird form, to an ashes form, then to a renewed form), to modifications, without a brake in the causal chain.  If we were aware of the movements of our lives, we would be also aware of its cyclic nature, but for most of us, cyclic movement is only a background, of which we pay little attention.    


We live within the great circulations of the Universe.  The Hebrew prophet, Ezekiel, described this cosmic movement as, “wheels within wheels.”  We live through the cycles of our lives, even before birth we must gestae for nine months, then the life cycle: birth, growth, death, decay.  Every manifest thing has duration, and moves in step with Universal Nature’s cycles: beginning, middle, and end.  Within Universal Nature’s Great Wheel are numerous major and minor wheels, Our Milky Way or galactic cycle-our imagination can scarcely grasp at the enormity of its cyclic movements or duration.  Then there is the cyclic movement of our solar system within the our galaxy.  Then are the lesser movements, our planet Earth’s 365 day movement around our Sun, our Earth’s 24 hour rotation, and how about our satellite, the Moon’s 14 day cycle around our earth-“wheels within wheels.” All these cycles, and many, many more we know and do not know, are webbed together, and are causally linked one to another.  Nature repeats herself everywhere, and it is on her repetitive action that the laws of cycles are founded. 

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Guest Post: the inner characteristics in all things

By Lou DiVirgilio

As I age, and my body morphs into an older characterization of my younger self, my feeling of myself within my mind has not changed.  That is to say, in my mind my identity, my character, the way I use my energy, has remained constant.  And further, this felt quality of myself would remain the same even as I awakened from sleep, even if  I were hit on the head and lost consciousness, even if I awakened from a coma, even if I had amnesia.  This individualized quality of being is experienced, at sometime or another, by every spiritual awakened human being.  Even though there is unrelenting change bombarding our being, there is also a place of constancy within our consciousness, and this constancy gives us our feel of our unique quality.  


All manifest things have a certain predominant quality.  For instance, if an oak tree seed were planted, an oak tree would manifest, not a pine or maple tree.  The oak tree’s DNA has instructions and memory to form an oak tree; of course within the instructions are continuous adjustments of internal relations to external relations.  Therefore, not all oak trees would look 100% identical, but their oak treeness, their quality, their essential characteristics, and their function would predominately remain the same. 


You the reader, have probably noticed the difficulty of confidently understanding some of the meaning of certain ideas put forth in this blog. This difficulty arises first, from your unfamiliarity with the ideas put forth, and the limits of the English language for explanation.  The English language has no equivalent words for some of these ideas.  They are beyond its syntax.  That is the reason Sanskrit and other languages are used.  These other languages have incorporated these ideas into their word syntax.

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