>I have been watching Oprah’s new shows about Living your Best Life. Her trainer Bob Greene was on, and for homework had us ask what we are really hungry for- obviously as it pertains to emotional eating. I asked myself this question and the immediate answer I got: to be alive. I am hungry to feel alive.
When I eat a piece of chocolate, as I was when Bob was asking this question, the smoothness and silkiness of the chocolate gives me a feeling of being alive. When I was having a sugar low from not eating any the other day, when a basket of M&M cookies appeared, I ate one and instantly woke up.
I am trying to get my husband to make me feel alive by giving me attention and talking to me. I used to go shopping to feel alive. A spiritual teacher on Oprah said, “Give me drama so I feel alive.” Could it be everything we do is so we can feel alive?
We are alive, aren’t we? But why don’t we feel it?
So here is my intention for 2009- to ask myself this question and begin living the answers:
What behaviors can I begin NOW to make me feel more alive? (Just so you know, writing this blog was one of those behaviors- instead of the chocolate, which I still may have.)
What’s crucial here is what behaviors can I begin because it isn’t up to someone else to make me feel alive. Or some substance or addictive behavior. It is up to me bring out what is within me, which I know will make me feel more alive. It is false to believe an M&M cookie can really make me feel alive, at least in the long term. In the long term my sugar consumption will cause me diabetes, cancer and who knows what else. Am I alive then?
What behaviors can you begin in 2009 to make you feel more alive? Further, what behaviors are you doing presently that you think are making you feel alive? Are they really making you feel more alive, or are they zapping vital energy from you; such as the cookies, the shopping, the co-dependent relationships.
What does being truly alive mean to you? What would it feel like? What would it look like? What patterns and behaviors are obstructing your true Self; a self which is alive, vibrant and full of energy?
Let’s make 2009 be the year we let go of what is false and dampens us, and realize what truly fuels and feed us- the awakening energy of our souls.